Amalgamate
by XxAnimegirl300xX
Summary: Cardtalia/Cardverse AU. Alfred F. Jones has fallen into another world, where the royals are named after playing cards and now he is the King of Spades! USUK - Rating may very well be mature in the future. Human names used.


Alfred F. Jones, American citizen, college football star, jazz player, wanna be cartoonist, and hero extraordinaire was falling and for the life of him had no idea as to why.

One moment he'd been running down a shortcut in the back-most side of campus and launching himself over a huge puddle, and in the next moment he found himself inexplicable falling. And this was not a normal fall either; not like the type you have when you trip over the first step on the way home, or even like the one when your jerk face of a twin brother pulls some stupid joke on you in your sleep and you fall out of bed. No; this was the type of fall you would have if you were stupid enough to launch yourself off the top of a skyscraper. The type you get when the only outcome could be your very painful and messy death.

As his initial yell of shock drew to a close, air pushed against Alfred's face and clothing, his blue eyes watered and shone in fear, his arms and legs moved around as he instinctively tried to stop himself from falling into the deep dark abyss up ahead. As if he were a bird and not a very flightless man.

'Oh God, I'm about to die' the blonde haired man thought. Or maybe he was already dead and this falling sensation was the feeling of him going straight to hell! But why? He was a good kid wasn't he? He was a great hero! Sure, he was sorta loud, he had a bad temper, and he never knew how to avoid a fight, and maybe he was just a bit obnoxious like Matthew said, but surely he wasn't bad enough to go right to hell without even a trial!

He blinked despite himself and realized that wait, if this was the way to hell then wouldn't there be fire and the screams of others? But there were no other people, no screams cutting into the very cold air. Actually the only thing in the blackness and the air surrounding him was the great ticking of a clock.

"W-what?"

And as suddenly as he heard it, ahead, or below him, a great clock bigger than any college classroom appeared in the darkness as suddenly as his falling had started, and with a great crash he fell into the clock, leaving cracks in it's surface.

"Oww!" His vision swam before him in pain as Alfred held is head and sat up. Around him was still the pitch black space, save for the clock underneath him and a strange swirling mist that began to float up.

"Where am I?" He muttered to himself, his voice feeling rather small for the hugeness of the space around him right before a great loud 'HA' scared him from behind.

"Ha ha ha ha ha!"

Alfred turned, his eyes wide with panic as behind him a man appeared. The man was tall with silver hair and glinting red eyes that made his devil horns and black clothing somewhat validated.

"Looks like I, the Awesome Gilbert, was right of course. We have found him!"

Alfred blinked up at him and was on the verge of speech when another voice, much younger and with an unmistakably British accent, startled him from the front.

"This is him?"

Alfred turned once more to find himself face to face with another 'demon' maybe cat-looking guy, a little boy with huge eyebrows over his blue eyes and under his short blonde hair.

"Yes! The Awesome Gilbert is never wrong!"

"But what about yesterd-ah!"

"Shush it Pete!"

The man pulled at the boys ears, making the kid cry for his jerkiness as Alfred watched blinking in confusion.

Did he just fall from the sky into a black chunk of nothing, only to meet a couple of demon dudes who acted not only like it was nothing in itself, but actually like this nothing was completely expected? What?

Sure Alfred was used to some pretty weird things in his day. He was the guy who was taken up by aliens as a kid, although his brother hardly believed him. And he could also swear that those guys on television commercials were stealing his one-liners through telekinesis. But this brand of weirdness was not the type of weirdness that was .. well...not weird.

Grinning he tried to get their attention.

"Um, 'cuse me dudes, but uh, anybody wanna... tell me whats going on?"

The two guys stopped their squabbling and grinned; this was the moment they'd been waiting for.

"Hello honored guest" Gilbert said mockingly, "Congratulations! We, the awesome Jokers, are pleased to inform you that you have been chosen as the new King of Spades!"

"Ta-dah!" Peter added, throwing confetti into the air.

They grinned expectantly, as if waiting for some of response, and Alfred blinked again.

"Say... what?"

Gilbert now frowned, "What do you mean 'what'?"

"Yeah! We just told you some awesome-good news you, bloody hooligan!"

Alfred raised a brow and thought that he must be dreaming or something, a thought that had been crossing his mind more and more frequently today.

"I mean 'what' as in, what the heck are you going on about?"

Gilbert's frown deepened, and he cursed.

"Don't tell me we just pulled a complete idiot from the other world and made him king, did we?"

"He does look sorta goofy" Peter said thoughtfully.

"Yeah.. sorta weird donch'a think? My spell should'a picked someone as awesome as my magic is."

"Ha ha! Maybe it did!" Peter said earning a sharp rap on the head.

"Hey, you big bully! I was just saying!"

Alfred stood, now just a little annoyed.

"Hey! I'm not an idiot! Sure my math grade could be better... and my Literature grade isn't great either.. but I still do well in general and I know a lot of other stuff!"

The two demon guys looked amused for a moment before they burst out into laughter, and only after they settled down did Peter speak.

"I don't care if he'd an idiot anymore. He's funny!"

"Yeah, he'll be a riot for your grumpy brother!"

"That wasn't a joke" Alfred mumbled.

"Anyway" Gilbert said turning serious despite the smirk on his face, "We really don't have much time, so I'll explain uber quick. I am Gilbert, and this guy's Peter. We are the Jokers."

"At your service!" Peter said cheerfully.

"We are the keepers of the world we've just dragged you in. Although you're not from here, you have now become a staple for the world you will shortly be entering. You have no choice in the matter either. Because it's out job to keep it at peace as much as possible without the different countries screwing it up,"

"But they always do." Peter said.

"We have chosen you to be apart of it. Where we are standing in now is only the space between the world you know and the one you're going to."

"Yeah! This place is pretty empty, but don't worry, the real world that everyone else is in looks much better!"

"So basically you're here 'cuz we need you to bring the peace. Got it?"

Gilbert moved closer before Alfred could respond, taking out a golden spade-shaped watch on a thick golden chain.

He put it around Alfred's neck and stepped back grinning.

"And so, we now welcome you to this new world, King of Spades."

The finality of his voice startled Alfred, and he looked up just in time to feel Gilbert's hand on his head.

"Good luck Your Majesty."

And suddenly Alfred was pushed back into the clock-floor, and felt the very ground give way beneath him as Peter, the little jerk, moved forward and punched him right in the chest and sending him through the very floor and into a bright glow.

"See yuh later!" the boy called over him, floating in mid air.

"Not again!" Alfred yelled back, this time he was falling facing the sky, falling into a bright light. The glow lasted only a moment though before it disappeared and Alfred found himself looking into a ceiling that looked suspiciously like stone. Not that he had much time to think on the meaning of it, as a moment later there was a large crash as he landed painfully on his back into a stone block floor.

"... Ow..." he groaned feeling dizzy, before a great scream pierced the air from somewhere to his left.

Alfred looked to the noise and was startled and confused as he looked at what was a group of finely dressed people who looked like characters from an old Disney fairy-tale, their dresses and suits looking very suspiciously like those of British nobles.

But maybe even more startling was that there wasn't just this big-eyed group, but Alfred was actually sitting in the middle of a huge main hall of what was obviously a castle that was filled with these guys. In stunned silence they stared at Alfred, giving him the look someone would only give to a ferociousness animal instead of a normal kid like him. Besides the fact he'd just fallen from the ceiling, why were they staring at him like that when in fact they should probably be asking him if he was alright. Was it something on his cloth- what!

Alfred's eyes widened as he looked down and realized that he was no longer wearing his normal street clothes anymore, but under the bomber jacket that had curiously remained was a blue suit decorated in many black lacy spades like the ones you saw on playing cards. Even his sneakers had changed into a pair of long black riding boots. Not that his wardrobe was all too important in this situation anyway. The people around him were still frozen were they stood, and because their stares were making him rather uncomfortable and self conscious, he decided to break the ice.

"Um... hello there!"

The effect was like a cannon going off, as screams echoed around the stone walls, and a great shouting came from the crowd, and then someone down the great hall with another noticeably British accent commanded "Guards! Seize him!"

Solders seemed to appear out of nowhere, with big spears pointing at him from all sides in a circle of sharp weaponry.

Alfred felt his sweat increase, his hands get clammy and his eyes widened as he thought for perhaps the tenth time today, "Oh my God, I'm going to die."

He said a quick prayer mentally to God, apologizing for being such a jerk and a bother when another voice, Asian this time saved his life.

"Aiyah! Wait, aru! Hold on a second!"

Alfred turned around on the floor as the guards behind him gave way, allowing a short obviously Chinese man judging from the oriental-styled blue robes, to walk up to him.

Was it just Alfred, or was blue everyone's favorite color?

His hair was in a long pony tail, and he was frowning down at Alfred with brown eyes in a way that was more curious than it was scary.

"Yao! What is the meaning of this!"

It was the British voice again, Alfred noted, as he looked down the hall and noticed the man speaking was actually one sitting on one of two thrones set upon an elevated block. It was a man with yellow hair and green eyes and huge bushy eyebrows just like the Joker's, Peter was it? Obviously from the miniature crown on his head the man was royalty, and thus the ruler of whatever fantasy land he just jumped into.

"Please hold on your Highness," said Yao, capturing Alfred's attention against as he pointed down at him. "You there, where did you get that watch around your neck?"

There were gasps and Alfred looked down and found with a jolt the spade shaped watch, remembering how Gilbert forced it on him.

He held it up, earning more excited mumbled from the crowd of people around him, and even the soldiers in what he guessed was surprised lowered their weapons slightly. Thank God! Maybe that jerk Gilbert had saved him after all!

He gave a sheepish grin up at the man, still wary of another attack.

"Would you believe me if I said a couple of demons put it on me?"

The crowd went wild at this, talking even louder,

"He has the watch!"

"Did you see him fall from the sky?"

"Horned demons? The Jokers for sure!"

"It must be him!"

"The King!"

Yao smiled, although it was more of a tug on the sides of his mouth, and a rueful tug at that, before looking back at the man on the throne who was staring at Alfred now in astonishment.

"I thought as much. My Queen, it sees that this man has been chosen by the Jokers as our new King of Spades, aru."

"... Eh?" In the following silence it hit Alfred's mind that one, the guy sitting on the throne was actually a Queen thus meaning maybe he'd been mistaken and actually that guy was actually a girl, and two, for the second time today people were pointing at him and calling him some sorta King of garden tools.

But then without warning the Queen marched right up to Alfred, giving him such a shock he moved back despite the fact there were still a bunch of weapons behind him.

Whether or not this person was a chick or a dude, they were also the meanest looking person Alfred had ever met, with his eyebrows kneading together and his eyes glinting dangerously in aggression.

"I don't believe it!" They shouted, sounding very manly much to add to Alfred's confusion. But something in Alfred mind also sparked with annoyance at the exclamation. Was this jerk actually calling him a liar! If there was anybody who should be in denial, it should be him! The solders at this now raised their weapons again.

"H-hey! I know I probably look really bad right now, crashing in on your... whatever party you're having here, but what kind of guy would lie about something like that if he didn't want to look like, uber crazy and stuff!" He glanced at the group around him, "Although actually as upside down as their world is, you guys would probably find it normal." He muttered.

The man in front of him gave him a rather superior searching look that definitely rubbed Alfred the wrong way now, especially as he realized now that probably anybody would lie in a situation like this if it would save their life.

The guy made a noise of annoyance.

"I don't want your silly little excuses, boy. If you having that watch doesn't prove your claims, a whole lot of good your words will do." He looked to the crowd and spoke for them to hear. "For all we know, he can by an enemy spy come to act as imposer and make our kingdom vulnerable! I say that we have give him a test!"

There was a cheer from the crowd suddenly. A fickle bunch weren't they, Alfred thought in annoyance. Quite frankly Alfred didn't care either way if these people believed his story or not, all he wanted at the moment was his nice warm bed and a nice cold hundred bottles of beer to help him forget this crazy-ass dream.

Yao at least seemed to be the only one on his side at the moment.

"Sire," He said quietly to the grumpy faced man, "are you sure you want to? What if he really is the King and he is harmed, aru!"

"Hmph! Well if he is indeed harmed by my tests then I guess that would mean he wasn't meant to be King. After all, what Kingdom would want a weak King in the first place?"

The Queen gave Alfred a nasty smirk, and Alfred felt his face heat up in annoyance.

Weak was he? Ha! Alfred didn't care who this Royal douche-bag was. Alfred was a hero, and this guy was about to get a nice heroic lesson in the form of an ass-kicking! He sighed.

Whatever, he really didn't care. Okay, he did, but that only made it worse. So Alfred smiled, a bright, happy, I'm-trying-not-to-be-angry-even-if-I-am smile that he learned so well in the face of much more threatening bozos before this pansy, before he said with a cheeriness that could have fooled anybody,

"Well, it's a good think I am 'so weak'; no idiot would ever want an ugly Queen like you anyway."

There was an all-around gasp and the room went silent, even Yao looked perturbed, and in a surprising wave of guilt Alfred knew his touched a nerve as the formerly superior looking Queen's eyes widened in sudden hurt and his face turned a blotchy red color. But in the next minute said Queen shifted to rage, and Alfred stopped feeling guilty or even fearful immediately.

"Why you low-down cur! How dare you speak that way to me!"

Alfred was unimpressed. This guy reminded him of this girl he once knew. All fronting and mean one moment, but then when you dared to say something they went all crybaby on you. Just another jerk with a Napoleon complex.

"Hmph. A Queen who can give whatever flack they want but can't take a hit?"

"Oh ho! I can't take a hit can't I?"

Suddenly Alfred felt something strike across his face, and it was after a moment that Alfred realized that the Queen has just struck him with a light blue glove across the face. He had a nasty look on his face that was now only a foot away from his own.

"I, Arthur Kirkland, Queen of Spades, challenge you to a duel! Then we'll see who can't take a hit!"

"Aiyah! Sir, are you sure about this? There are other tests that we can put him through."

Arthur Kirkland looked towards Yao Wang, the Jack of Spades and his companion of many years with a frown. "Of course I am sure."

They and the crowd of people from the throne room were now filled out into the courtyard, a huge rectangle surrounded by the thick stone walls of the Castle of Spades. A rectangular line of stones in the middle highlighted the castle's main arena and the rest of the courtyard was decorated with the odd blue leafed tree or bush that grew either those blue and purple roses that Arthur liked so much or the dark blue or black spade fruit that populated the kingdom.

Around on the walls were shelves of weaponry that were kept up during the day for the Knights in training, or even simply the soldiers on their shifts. Arthur, now changed from his more glamorous clothing he wore for the court to that of his more simple but still noble styled dueling clothing, picked up his weapon, a regular sword that was meant to be used for such occasions as this compared to his more ceremonial ornament that usually hung at his side. Either weapon would do it's job of course in case of emergency, however he certainly didn't want to get his nice sword dirty.

Arthur looked to the other side of the courtyard at his opponent, and smirked. No, certainly not with such an unworthy opponent's blood. The man child was grinning at a couple of serving ladies as they offered him a cup of water and he began choosing a sword from the shelf on that side.

The strange man who'd fallen from the ceiling in the middle of the court, with no identification, and who was claimed to be the new King of Spades. He snorted.

Only a fool would believe that whoever this imposer was, no matter how official that Spades Watch made him look, could actually be their long-awaited King.

The Kingdom of Spades for the last hundred years had been a Kingless country. When the old king had died, when Arthur was just turning fifteen himself, he had been chosen to be the Queen. At the time he'd simply been the son of a noble gentleman, and had as much of a chance at being chosen as any other man.

But while attending the funeral, the old Queen whose round golden clock had run out with the old King's life began ticking as he went to pay his respects.

She'd smiled at him kindly, and with graying eyes looked over to her beloved court and exclaimed, 'It seems my work here is done. All hail your new Queen, the new Queen of Spades.' She'd taken then her last breath, leaving everything in confusion as the court found themselves with a brand new ruler without many even being aware the old one was gone! And he'd done all he could to prove himself then.

He'd managed to strengthen the Royal Navy, they country began producing more trade. There were no real wars in his time of rule, only short battles that he, the Queen of Spades won, and everything had been pleasant. Even when the Jack was found, on a day two years after the Queen's coronation when Yao and his ambassador father visited the kingdom and was chosen by the Sword of Spades that hung above the throne, the Kingdom was not put into any type of trouble. Everything since he'd begun his control over the Spade Kingdom had been smooth sailing.

Although they still hadn't had a King.

Many people had been under the impression that they wouldn't take a King at all. The Watch of Spades had been the antique used to determine who would take the throne, but it had disappeared when the old King died. Everyone knew that the Jokers, the mysterious beings who sometimes popped up to a certain citizen or Royal at a certain time, had taken the item.

But of course he, like many, had assumed it meant nothing special. That is, until the recent trouble began.

There was tension building in the other countries.

The Kingdom of Hearts and the Kingdom of Clubs had both begun acting strangely, more aggressively. The skirmishes between their lines and other countries were becoming more and more frequent. And even apparently to King Francis of Diamond country who corresponded regularly as a pseudo-ally of the Kingdom of Spades, the threat of war was growing larger. It wasn't upon them yet of course. But it was close.

Thus, this was no time for confusion to be growing in the middle of the Royal seat.

The Kingdom of Spades did not need to be stuck with a King at the moment. A new King would be unstable, unused to being in the seat of power.

A new king could not be trusted.

And so was the reason for his initial reaction to the boy who fell through the sky.

But now he had another reason to deny this man as his King.

That stupid git had actually had the nerve to call him ugly! He bristled at the very thought!

"Do not worry Yao," he spat in renewed anger "in the next few minutes this stupid charade will be over, mark my words."

Alfred looked up at the sound of a trumpet, and with a spike of worry looked towards his opponent. The Queen of Spade walked towards the center of the rectangle his sword in hand and expertly held ahead of him, and a look on his face that was much too confident and dangerous for Alfred's taste as he now moved to he center as well, holding his own sword out, trying to mimic the other's hold although he felt ridiculous and unprepared. After all, he'd never held a real sword before. The closest thing to this were those fake little wooden things that he and Matthew would put together when they were back at their grandparents farm down south and had an entire field to run around in. And even in GYM when they took fencing lessons with a couple of fake plastic pointers with the ends blunted so they wouldn't kill themselves was inadequate preparation.

How in the world did he manage to get himself into such situations, he thought as he felt the sweat on his brow. He knew the reason of course; his parents and then even his brother were always telling him that his bad habit of instigating was going to lead to his downfall.

But it wasn't like he tried to instigate. He didn't just walk up to thugs on the street and dare them to a fight. His problem was simply that he had a strong sense of justice, and a big ego, and his pride, and he simply was not devious enough for flight when it come down to things. And it was more that which actually started his many battles.

When he was younger he actually had the habit of sticking up for his weaker classmates, especially when his brother was very frequently that classmate.

When he got a bit older it was his friends who always seemed to have some sort of trouble. 'Hey man, I got this goon on mah back man, come on man, please, you gotta help me!'

After enough of those he actually ended up in Juvi.

'Look, you're a good kid Al, but you just don't know how to keep your cool, you know?'

Well, he did know. And he really had tried to do something about it when he was back home. It was actually the reason he joined football wasn't it? Sports gave him what his guidance counselors called 'a positive outlet'.

So now that he thought about it, he should be really surprised at all that he was here. Simply put, Alfred was just a fight waiting to happen, and it didn't help that the other guy was just as much a trouble maker as he was.

As he looked at that stupid smug face, Alfred felt himself become even more determined, even as he realized that he was very much at fault for what was about to happen. If he'd been more like Matthew, he would have been able to find some way to prove himself honest from the get-go. But he wasn't quite that bright.

"The winner will be determined by whoever either dies or become unarmed first aru." Yao said, sending a worried glance between the two men.

"Ready to call your mother to come and save you?" Alfred heard from the face he was very much starting to dislike at that moment, and he straightened his stance, the adrenaline he knew and loved from his great many football and boxercising seasons began pumping throughout his body. He grinned sunnily, almost cheerful.

"Ladies first."

With a yell of rage, the Queen started forward, as if in slow motion to Alfred.

"Get ready to die you lowborn welp!"

But even as the first thrust was launched at him, Alfred felt an almost instinctive pull on his body as he moved forward, pushing his weight down and then up into a curve and pounced right into the moving Queen, knocking into his legs, and sending him right over his body in a move his football coach would have been proud of.

Arthur felt himself flip right in the air, and landed with a thud right on his back in surprise, but still clutching his sword.

"The hell?"

Alfred moved back a few spaces, grinning as the surprised Royal jumped back up to his feet, now shaky from the impact to his legs.

"...why you..."

"Oh, I'm sorry, I thought we were doing battle." Alfred said mockingly.

Now he felt a wave of excitement!

Another thrust to the left, a swing over head, and sharp jab to the right, the sword play felt like dancing! Alfred blocked them well enough much to his surprise.

It was as if all those years of dodging punches and kicks in the alleyways of New York City were coming back to him, sharpening his reflexes, and telling him what to do.

He could also tell that his opponent was surprised too, Alfred thought with satisfaction as the Queen of Spades gritted his teeth in annoyance.

But Alfred's satisfaction was beginning to wane, as the Queen picked up the pace of his attacks. Damn he was fast, he thought as one stroke nearly broke through his defenses, sneaking it way towards his head on the left. The grumpy guy smirked at that one, and kept on thrusting at him.

The crowd around them watched in small silence, holding their breath or gasping as the tides of the small battle shifted and waved.

At some points Alfred was winning, taking a small risk to try offensive, and beating the spoiled Royalty back just a little. But most of the time he knew he was the one in defensive.

After all, this wasn't a battle he really wanted to end in bloodshed.

Quite frankly, none of his battles ever felt like that that.

"You know, you could give up if yuh wanted to" Alfred said through a pant, right after blocking a fierce upper cut from the Royal.

"Ha! Feeling the weight of your imminent defeat are we?"

"Umm.. No actually." Alfred said, swatting down the prideful tone in the Queens voice. "It's just this battle is sorta pointless anyway. I mean, we're not really fighting over nothing in the first place."

"You think that imposing as the King of my kingdom as if we're just a bunch of bloody fools is nothing?"

In a rage the man swung forward, and Alfred barely jumped out the way.

"Hey! I haven't done any imposing! It's your friend who said anything about that silly watch in the first place!"

But the Queen was relentless, he kept coming forward, moving quickly, jabbing at as many sides as he possibly could, and Alfred could only hold on enough to block them or jump out the way.

But he had to stop it soon, he could feel his chest heaving now, and his arm, not used to so much swinging as it was throwing things around was growing tired. There was one awful moment, when just as the Queen had sent a thrust his way that although his sword tool the hit in time, his arm gave a funny spasm and his defense nearly broke down. It was lucky that his opponent had been expecting a rock solid block that time though, cuz if he hadn't he could have actually done some real damage! And he realized it too, and the finely dressed Royal gave him a mocking smirk, and send a new volley of thrusts his way.

He had do to something! Stop the fight!

"Dude, this fight is going nowhere! I really don't see the point of it anymore."

Arthur paused for a moment as he digested the words before gritting his teeth once more in a low growl. "You don't see the point? You bloody idiot wanker!"

Wildly the Queen of Spades began launching his sword at him in large swings in every direction.

"You-don't-know-the-point-of-this-stupid-battle-even-after you-humiliated-me-right-in-front-of-the-bloody-court?"

Alfred's eyes widened with every swing, easily rolling his sword along with it, deflecting them away. Was that what this was all about?

At another growl of rage, Alfred held his sword against a long strike overhead, their arms fighting to keep it's strength against the weight of the other's.

".. You're fighting with me... because I called you ugly?"

"YES, YOU IDIOT!"

Well that made sense, Alfred thought quietly as the mad royal brought on another harsh strike against him. That was so... childish of him! Alfred looked down at the man with something akin to amusement. For all the airs he put on as being superior this guy, Arthur was it, was childishly having a sword battle over a very silly insult. Even forgetting that Arthur has called him weak first, Alfred had more been preoccupied with proving that he wasn't an enemy spy, and that stupid attitude than anything else. But now, he could actually see that the person fighting him wasn't really just thinking himself better than him. If he'd really felt it, then he wouldn't admit to letting the insult bother him, and actually.. he probably wouldn't have even noticed it at first either.

Too bad Alfred was only just catching on to that.

But he guessed that's what happened when he actually began reading the atmosphere as people called it. But really, he should stop the fight, he thought, before someone gets hurt for real. He just needed to get that sword away from Arthur.

But how?

He needed something shocking.

Something so completely out the blue that it would shock the Queen enough and he could just grab it and...

Then Alfred F. Jones, self-sacrificer, peace-maker, and heroic ladies-man extraordinaire very carefully, deliberately, and okay fine, it was silly and random and embarrassing, moved forward while dodging the last stroke of Arthur's blade and kissed the Queen of Spades, none-too-gently either, on the lips.

The crowd gasped and giggled and awed in amazement, as their beloved monarch the Queen of Spades and the man who was supposed to be their new King, stood in a lip-lock in the middle of a battlefield, right after a huge and exciting argument. Oh this was the gossip of a lifetime! Even Yao, who was usually so cheerful and happy in such cutesy situations was frozen in slight shock. But only for a moment. Aiyah.

Arthur sputtered as he stepped back, as far as he could from the man who'd just kissed him. Was this some kind of joke? His face was flushed red in embarrassment, and he was aware of his heart beating very fast as the crowd of his court chattered around them.

"W-wh-at, w-what do you think you're doing! Y-you wanker! Dd-do you know what you just-"

Alfred looked cheerfully, as cool as a cucumber, grinning down at the Queen of Spades who was sputtering and tripping over himself in confusion, before he couldn't help it and burst out into loud obnoxious laughter.  
>"Y-you git! Why are you laughing? Why are you-" He cut off as Alfred stopped and grinning at him, holding up not one anymore, but two objects in his hand.<p>

"Heh. Got your sword. I won."

There was a cheering from the crowd of people all around, the court was in excited pandemonium and awe at this new development that many hadn't even realized.

Yao tried to hide a smile despite himself as he walked up to the two royals, Arthur staring blankly up at the taller man, and grabbed their arms, forcing their hands to touch, before addressing the ecstatic crowd.

"Aiyah, ladies and gentlemen of the court, I now introduce to you unofficially of course, the new King of Spades, aru!"

With the sudden cheering, Alfred looked in surprise at the Chinese man and the blushing Brit, but before he would even think of the fact he was supposed to be denying this exclamation, he grinned slightly as his vision swam before his eyes instead, and he held his forehead drowsily.  
>"You know... I don't think I feel very well..." He told them thickly, as their expressions turned astonished.<p>

And then he blacked out.


End file.
